Gonzo's Blogstek

Getikt...

2009-03-30T23:09:00.003+02:00

Van haar :)

mijn obsessie van dit moment:

- Naast Johnny Depp dan :-) Ik ben op zoek naar een leuk koor/orkest/bandje waar ik trekzak kan spelen. Of een schilderclub. Nu de jongens wat ouder worden wil ik wat meer voor mezelf gaan doen...

wat draag ik nu: - mijn allesbehalve representatieve huispak: rode joggingbroek, oranje shirt met "Gonzo" erop (echt waar)

waar droom ik graag over - Johnny... :D en rondreizen door Frankrijk met een oude VW-bus, mijn jongens en mijn hartsvriendin, die helaas zo ver weg woont.

Wie heb ik het laatst een knuffel gegeven - oudste zoon

Wat ik vanavond eet - rijst met vis en geroerbakte prei.

Mijn laatste aanschaf - een oranje/bruin/rood/paarse pashmina met paisleypatroon, een joekel van een ding! tijdens een weekendje Egmond.

Waar ik nu naar luister - Radio 2 - Theater Van Het Sentiment. Daarna gaat Simeon ten Hold weer aan.

Favoriete weer-type - 20-25 graden, zonnetje, en de regen is voor 's nachts.

Mijn doel - dat de jongens goed terecht komen en ik mijn bestseller uit kan geven.

ik zeg tegen de persoon die mij heeft getagged - Ik pak je wel eens terug :D :D :D

Favouriete vakantieplek - Zee, Frankrijk (het niet toeristische gedeelte), Engeland

Films die ik keer op keer kan bekijken - Alles van Johnny Depp (behalve Private Resort en Nick of Time) en Tim Burton en verder ook Les Triplettes de Belleville, Cat Concerto, Bad Luck Blackie, Gypsy Caravan, alles van Tarantino, alles van Jim JArmusch, Mulholland Drive, Mamma Mia, Gone With The Wind, Terry Gilliam, spaghettiwesterns van Sergio Leone, Monty Python, LA Without A Map, The Sound Of Music, La Vita E Bella, Bridges of Madison County, Donnie Darko, Boondock Saints, BEing John Malkovich, A Fish Calles Wanda, Shrek en nog veel meer...

Het boek dat ik momenteel lees - mijn studieboek (LOI creatief schrijven), Hunter S Thompson (als ebook) en binnenkort Loser's Town van Daniel Depp (ja, broer van).

Wat mij momenteel veel plezier geeft, maar tegelijkertijd ook schuldgevoelens: - tijd voor mezelf eisen

Het landschap van mijn gedachten - de zee en het strand

Quote die indruk op mij heeft gemaakt - “If there’s any message to my work, it is ultimately that it’s OK to be different, that it’s good to be different, that we should question ourselves before we pass judgement on someone who looks different, behaves different, talks different, is a different color.” (Johnny Depp)

Wat zou ik willen hebben - een goede gezondheid en een normaal lijf

Waar ik op wacht - een maatje om af en toe samen dingen mee te ondernemen (museum, muziek maken en luisteren, films kijken en slap ouweh**ren)

Mijn tic - ik verzamel apart gekleurde vulpenvullingen, verzamel hoeden/petten en sjaals (en draag ze ook) en zing keihard mee met de autoradio op standje oorlog (sorry, buren)

Wat ga ik doen vandaag - slapen, denk ik...

Ik zou niet weten wie ik moet tikken, maar vrijwilligers zijn welkom ;)

A perfect cure for "one of those days"...

2009-01-04T21:10:00.002+01:00

...is Monty Python!

Time for a little quiz: the MP-quote on this boxer... Which scene, where, what? :-)

Another year's over...

2009-01-04T02:13:00.005+01:00

It is a wee bit late, but not too late to wish everybody a very good 2009! For many people (including me) it won't be easy. Credit crisis, being uncertain about keeping your job (or worse: certain about losing it), worries about the future...

This evening I saw on Dutch tv it could be worse. I saw people in the Gaza-strip who were almost literally standing with their back against the wall. They were ordered to leave their house, but they had no place to go...

Who were the biggest victims in another war? The average people. People who wanted to live their lives in peace. Who didn't have the choice when they were born in the Gaza-strip. They were born in the wrong time, at the wrong place.

Living in fear from the minute you were born... Not only there, but in so many other places. Born with the wrong race, or in the wrong neighborhood, or with the wrong gens, etcetera.

Another year's over, a new one just begun, war is over if you want it... John Lennon is turning in his grave so much that he would subsoil the soil of his grave if he wasn't cremated...

Nintendo DS

2008-12-30T00:55:00.004+01:00

Okay, I admit, an adult aged 45 with a Nintendo DS is a bit pathetic... But that Metroid Pinball thing is irresistable! I know I probably made a fool of myself on the boat to Terschelling 1 1/2 week ago, but hey, I had a great time!

And recently, there is a DS-thing (I wouldn't use the word "game") with 100 classical English books on it (Jane Austen, Shakespeare, Oscar Wilde, the Brontë-sisters, etc.)... It was great to have it with me when I was at the hairdresser this afternoon...!

But the saddest thing I have on the DS must be the aquarium... In fact, 2 x 5 tanks. With guppies, but also with whales and seals. It is like a Tamagotchi, needs food, good care, the proper water, a clean tank... And now I am worried because one of my clownfishes refuses to eat!

Hey, some single women start drinking alcohol. Or go manhunting (okay, I admit I fail on that one because I am not exactly the ideal woman). Or nag their kids (my oldest DS will say I DO nag...). So playing a Nintendo with a Tamagotchi-style aquarium and a great pinball machine is pretty innocent and harmless, isn't it...?

Sorry, time to go now, must feed the fishes!

Top 2000!

2008-12-26T00:38:00.002+01:00

For the 10th time/voor de 10e keer: Top 2000!

For the non-Dutchies: a tradition between Boxing Day and New Years Eve.

Click here for this year's list...

Click here for live broadcast...

What a way to end the old year and start a new one...!

MSN-troubles?

2008-12-24T15:48:00.002+01:00

I have lost some MSN-addresses in my MSN. Don't ask me why... If you haven't seen me online for a while, will you please (try to) add me again...? Thanks!

Trots/proud!

2008-12-23T01:15:00.005+01:00

Nog niet helemaal klaar, maar ik ben nu al supertrots op het resultaat...!

Not finished yet, but I am already very proud...!

De site van mijn tekstbedrijf!... (sorry, only Dutch)

"To cut the knot"...

2008-12-15T00:58:00.004+01:00

...is a Dutch expression. It means: dealing with a dilemma (or two). Based on the legend of the Gordian knot. That knot was in the temple of Zeus, and the Oracle said that the person who was able to unloose the knot, would rule the world.
Alexander the Great came, saw and conquered (long before Caesar did), took his sword and cut that knot, saying "no one said anything about HOW to unloose it!"

I untied a knot last week, after brainstorming for weeks, fighting doubts for months and gaining strength to fight a low self esteem for ages.

I decided to start my own business in 2009. I will do (Dutch) textwriting and -editing. It includes the jobs I am doing already.
My force will be: no high rates because no client has to pay for posh cars and office space. They pay for what they asked for: texts.

Many, really many people told me I made a good decision. Time will tell...!

Terschelling in the winter...

2008-12-15T00:56:00.002+01:00

...quiet, very cold, lonely, peace, rest, a warm place to rest... I want to spend the rest of my life there! (I was there this weekend, for 24 hours, thanks to a job-related task...)

Sleep well, dear gran...

2008-12-06T02:14:00.004+01:00

She was born in the year when World War I began: 1914. She married in the Thirties, and her oldest child/only daughter was born in 1937, when she was 23 years old. In our days she would almost have been a teenmum, but then she was considered very mature.

After that daughter, 3 boys were born. Two were born during WW2, the 3rd after the war, and he would never know what WW2 caused in The Netherlands. Like: his dad being forced to work for the Nazi-Germans (if not: deadpenalty), his mom and big sister every day in a row to get food...

I am her grandchild. I saw how her husband died in 1984 with the war in his eyes. I am the daughter of her little girl who grew up during the same war.

Grandma told me what it was to be a (temporarily) single mom during that war. During the "winter of hunger" in 1944-1945. That it was almost impossible to survive...

After a very long fight against old age, traumatic memories, sadness and being too tough for too long, she asked with her last breath to end this suffering.

Today, December 5th 2008, she received a good Sinterklaas-present: death. Liberation. Freedom. No more suffering, no more trauma's. REST!

Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.

I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glint on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you wake in the morning hush,
I am the swift, uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circling flight.
I am the soft starlight at night.

Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there, I did not die!

Partyyyy!!!!!

2008-11-23T01:50:00.002+01:00

This week I have something to celebrate... It is 2 years ago I spit my 1st Gonzoblog online. And it does need a kind of celebration...

Okay, it probably has about a dozen WW-points... And I finally start to loose weight after a lifetime struggle with gaining from nothing... So I decided to watch the pic of it to celebrate ;) and then go to bed with a good feeling :D

The Mad Hatter

2008-11-23T01:38:00.003+01:00

This is the original Mad Hatter from Alice In Wonderland:

This is the Disney version:

This is the Tom Petty version, in one of his great clips: And this Mad Hatter will enter the theatres in 2010. It is Johnny Depp, who else, in Tim Burton's, who else, version of Alice in Wonderland. When I see the hair, I think he is Mrs. Lovett's Son.

Wow! I can't wait!!!

Blast from the past

2008-11-23T01:35:00.001+01:00

Youtube is a real goldmine for old clips!!! And then I found this beauty from 1995...! From Nick Cave's album Murder ballads, one of the best albums he ever made. And with one of the most unexpected duets he ever did: with Kylie Minogue!

Even in the Netherlands it reached the Top 40/100...!

Pure passion...

2008-11-13T07:56:00.002+01:00

Musicians all over the world playing and singing "Stand By Me". But... That Amsterdam-scene doesn't look Dutch at all... Anyway, the result is breath-taking!

Dom, lomp, famous en f*cking brilliant!!!

2008-11-12T21:13:00.005+01:00

This clip may contain rude lyrics and explicit scenes...

Via de digitale versie van "Onze Taal" zag ik een clip van The Opposites (wie?!?) met Dio en Willy Wartaal, met "Dom, Lomp & Famous". Opgenomen in Parijs, maar dat is niet de enige reden waarop ik helemaal overstag ging voor dit clipje. De tekst is namelijk hilarisch!

Als je die voor het eerst hoort (of leest), vraag je je vast af waarom... Kreten als "bitch", "penis" en "ik haat die wijven" springen telkens telkens opnieuw boven de half verstaanbare woordenbrij uit; gecombineerd met "zo'n accent" denk je al gauw dat daar alwéér zo'n agressieve groep opgepimpte ghettobewoners staat te schetteren... Maar als je het clipje ziet, weet je meteen wat "functionele schuttingtaal" betekent.

Hier wordt even genadeloos de vloer aangeveegd met die walgelijk agressieve muziekstroming inclusief overdreven uiterlijk vertoon en extreem vrouwonvriendelijke teksten (een stroming die ik op basisscholen helaas ook al ben tegengekomen...).

NB de sample is van Liar Liar door The Castaways.

For the Simpsons-fans!

2008-11-09T21:30:00.000+01:00

All intro's stewed in a 4 minute clip... GREAT!!!

Julie Andrews turns 69 :D

2008-11-04T02:05:00.005+01:00

My dad sent me this...! ;)

To commemorate her birthday, actress/vocalist, Julie Andrews made a special appearance at Manhattan's Radio City Music Hall for the benefit of the AARP. One of the musical numbers she performed was 'My Favorite Things' from the legendary movie 'Sound Of Music'. Here are the lyrics she used:

(Sing It! - If you sing it, it is especially hysterical!!!)

Botox and nose drops and needles for knitting,
Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings,
Bundles of magazines tied up in string,
These are a few of my favourite things.

Cadillacs and cataracts, hearing aids and glasses,
Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses,
Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,
These are a few of my favourite things.

When the pipes leak, When the bones creak,
When the knees go bad,
I simply remember my favourite things,
And then I don't feel so bad.

Hot tea and crumpets and corn pads for bunions,
No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,
Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they bring,
These are a few of my favourite things.

Back pain, confused brains and no need for sinnin',
Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin',
And we won't mention our short shrunken frames,
When we remember our favourite things.

When the joints ache, When the hips break,
When the eyes grow dim,
Then I remember the great life I've had,
And then I don't feel so bad.

(Ms. Andrews received a standing ovation from the crowd that lasted over four minutes and repeated encores. Please share Ms. Andrews' clever wit and humour with others who would appreciate it)

Jobhunting

2008-11-04T00:50:00.006+01:00

I still have no official announcement that my contribution was no longer needed, but I decided not to wait.

Thanks to Henk, a very dear close friend, I found some jobs in the place where he works, and I have already written the letters (2 digital, 1 on paper).

I don't like jobhunting... It is like selling your soul in a ratrace where only better and best counts. I am not an ambitious pushy person. I do my job, I fight like a pitbull to reach my goals (one condition: I have to believe in it), but I am not Mrs.Popular or Mrs.Career-Savvy. But I have to sell myself. I don't want to live on benefits! But...

In my country, you are considered hopeless when you are 45+ and looking for a job (unless you want to sell insurances by telephone and like to be treated like shit by potential customers...)

I also have to fight a lot of prejustice, being a 45 year old single, obese mom with 2 aspergerkids who need extra care, and a chronical lung disease... Which boss wants to try me, and find my strong points...?

I have a lot to offer, but you have to look through the cover...! ;) I am stress resistant (you have to, as a single mom with 2 aspergerkids), I can organize (same reason), and I keep my cool...!

Backstabbing

2008-10-30T09:16:00.004+01:00

It is not exactly a joy to find out your boss is looking for someone to replace you.

But how do you call it when you find out on the public website of your company, that they are looking for someone to take over your job? Ignorance? Being rude?

I wish they had been more open, so I didn't have to find out this way. But... I will write a letter for that job! After all, I already have several years experience in that job!

Too good to be forgotten...!

2008-10-27T19:25:00.007+01:00

Liz mentioned yesterday that there was a new album of the Sparks.

The Sparks? You mean those two brothers, one looked, sang and acted like a diva on speed, and the other one looked like an alien Charlie Chaplin who just had landed on earth for the first time? Yes, those Sparks.

In The Netherlands they hit big time with songs like "This Town Ain't Big Enough For Both Of Us". That was in 1974.

In 1979 they came back with "Beat The Clock".

I didn't know they were still active, but Liz sent me a recent song and that really did sound good!

In 1977 I got their album "Kimono My House", but I don't have it anymore (ah, yes, the sad fate having a divorce and moving to a much smaller house...). After my conversation yesterday I decided to download it and WOW! It was even better than I remembered!

The almost (not always) perfect high voice of Russel Mael, in combination with the keyboard of his brother Ron, the rockguitar and the drums that sound like a battlefield with guns, got me again! Best song, even 31 years after I got the album, is still "Equator".

I want their new album!

Tea from heaven

2008-10-24T00:31:00.002+02:00

I saw this tea in the shop, bought it and fell in love...! This tea has a real chocolate taste!

Quality time

2008-09-27T02:07:00.008+02:00

A week ago, I took youngest offspring (10) to Mamma Mia. He loved it!!!

This evening youngest DS was away with the scouts. I decided to take oldest DS out for dinner (I had a little financial luck!) and went with him to a Greek restaurant.
The quality there was mwoah: main dish okay, mixed grill... And free salad but poor choice... And horrible dessert with fresh fruit = apple, tasteless pear, dry orange and sloppy kiwi. But we had fun!

We talked about etiquette and social acceptance (I tried to tell him some values, knowing that his dad will destroy them again...), and had a good laugh about the fake replica's of classic Greek statues.

"Do you remember them from the Louvre?" I asked.
DS shrugged. "Nah... Show me five statues and I don't see any difference..."
He loved the Louvre when we were there. But he had nothing with the statues.

Then we started giggling about the male nudes. About plaster male parts dangling above your dinner. And about plaster arses for those who have dinner at the other side of the statue.

We had serious talk about school, bullying (he has been a victim at junior school, and that leaves deep wounds) and friends (something that is not easy to understand when you have asperger).

And we were talking about Asperger, too. The thing called "disorder" that rules our life, but is also full of challenges and new points of view.

Later that evening, I picked up youngest DS after an evening with the scouts, where he has been watching male deers trying to fancy the females, making noises. He also saw otters and was very impressed by the sundown. "Mom, it looked like savannes!"

I feel so rich with my two special boys! But why is our society making it so hard for them to live, study and work, why are "normal" kids bullying them, and why are older Aspergers so traumatized by bullying and misunderstandings that they have problems in their life...

Anyway...

I finally finished my over 10 year struggle for diagnosis and help! It was a long way, and it asked a lot from me, but hell, it was worth it! They are so unique and precious!

For catlovers and -haters...

2008-09-18T19:56:00.003+02:00

It starts slow, but it is worth to watch till the end. Warning: don't try this at home...!

Mamma Mia...!

2008-09-17T01:00:00.005+02:00

In 1977 I turned 14. And no way I would love Abba! Abba was for silly children, I was too cool for that...!

But I found out Abba was more than silly disco or poppy tunes. And in their last years the lyrics became better and better (with highlights like The Day Before You Came and The Winner Takes It All).

This summer, the musical Mamma Mia came out as a movie. I thought it would be "fun" to go there, so my dear Dutch friend San and me went... and fell head over heels in love with it! That day I had some bad phonecalls (one of the reasons I didn't blog for several weeks... no worries, they are solved now) and I felt like I couldn't sink lower, but I left the theater with a grin, and a tune in my head!

The second time was in Portsmouth, with my dear English friend Liz. Again, I left the theater with a grin, and kept humming the music for days!

The third time I went with San again, as a happy birthday party for two... The theater was still half full, the audience even applauded after the movie, and we loved the little toddler who danced on the music!

And now I want to go with youngest DS...! He knows the music and I think he will leave the cinema humming, too...!

My favourite characters? Bill Anderson (I really didn't recognize Bootstrap Bill!) and Rosie (the short one from "Donna and the Dynamos").

And... big fun for both mom and daughter, because there are young ánd older men without shirts in it...!

Icarus

2008-07-05T01:32:00.001+02:00

Musee des Beaux Arts - W.H. Auden

About suffering they were never wrong,
The old Masters: how well they understood
Its human position; how it takes place
While someone else is eating or opening a window or just walking dully along;
How, when the aged are reverently, passionately waiting
For the miraculous birth, there always must be
Children who did not specially want it to happen, skating
On a pond at the edge of the wood:
They never forgot
That even the dreadful martyrdom must run its course
Anyhow in a corner, some untidy spot
Where the dogs go on with their doggy life and the torturer's horse
Scratches its innocent behind on a tree.

In Brueghel's Icarus, for instance: how everything turns away
Quite leisurely from the disaster; the ploughman may
Have heard the splash, the forsaken cry,
But for him it was not an important failure; the sun shone
As it had to on the white legs disappearing into the green
Water; and the expensive delicate ship that must have seen
Something amazing, a boy falling out of the sky,
Had somewhere to get to and sailed calmly on

Tears on the beach

2008-07-04T14:50:00.004+02:00

I am "blessed" with a very obese body. A healthy thinking and feeling woman with normal female feelings trapped in a bag of fat. It is not because I have an eating disorder. I have COPD and a beginning lung emphysemia. Lots of prednison and some other medicins in the past killed my metabolism. I am on permanent diet to avoid worse, but I already look like Jabba the Hut (BMI 40).

Thanks to the COPD, I can't train enough. I have to train of course, and I always will! But it can't be enough to lose weight.

One of the conseqenses is: it is almost impossible to find a good male friend. I don't want wedding bells or so, because I love my freedom and if I ever meet Mr.Right, I would go for LAT (Living Apart Together) and nothing more. It is not easy having a mixed family. I am realistic enough to realize that.

But I miss those silly things like watching a movie together, discussing things (in a respectable way... since my divorce I learned that is possible!), sharing nice and sad things, and don't forget some good sex now and then... I miss it more and more each day. And I am about to give up hope that I will ever do those things. Let's face it: real beauty lies inside, but who wants to have a relationship with a whale?

I try to live with that, accept it, enjoy my own good company, and it is hard, but I'll survive.

But sometimes I break. Like yesterday, when I went to the beach for a nice stroll. The beach was quiet, only a few couples were there. Walking, sometimes hand in hand, a few couples kissed. It seemed National Happy Couple Beach Walking Day...

And again, it was so hard to accept that those things a simple stroll with a partner along the beach and a little kiss at sundown, is almost certainly a not-anymore-for-you-thing... If I would have been healthy and normal sized, I could dream about it and keep hope. But I am realistic enough to know this is over for me.

Tomorrow I think I can deal with it again and I'll hate myself for my selfpity. But today I prefer to be dead and buried. Life is great, but it is best with someone at your side who loves you...

Tim gets a star!

2008-06-20T01:14:00.001+02:00

In 2009, Tim Burton will get a star on the Hollywood Boulevard... He deserves it!

Even the BBC likes it...!

2008-06-19T22:36:00.005+02:00

TV-commercials are horrible, but there are a few exceptions. The "Apeldoorn"-commercials became legendary, and supermarket Albert Heijn is also known for its great commercials.

Since 2006 or so they have this great store manager (real name: Harry Piekema) with his assistent Rachid.

With every football (soccer) event (world or European championship) Albert Heijn has gadgets. This year it is the Welpie (little cub) in orange of course, our national colour.

And of course that needs a new commercial... Even the BBC likes it! Listen to Adrian Chiles (sp)...

BTW it's not Albert Bella, it's Albert Heijn :)

The most beautiful EK-football-2008-gadget...

2008-06-12T23:52:00.003+02:00

Brulshirts! (= roarshirts)

Stickmen

2008-05-23T00:24:00.004+02:00

My DS came home last week with a great downloading idea! It is an animation program called Pivot and in a simple way, you make animations with stickmen. There are prefab horses, elephants and some other things, but you can also design something by yourself.

You save the animation as a GIF-file.

My offspring is really brilliant with it! I think Tim Burton will have some competition soon...! ;)

Bygones

2008-05-20T03:33:00.003+02:00

There was a lot of truth hidden behind the hilarious fun of Ally McBeal...!

The Wild Rover

2008-05-16T20:55:00.002+02:00

This is Dutch!

A band called Rapalje, with their very own special version of the Wild Rover...!

Froggie

2008-05-15T01:26:00.004+02:00

The most common frogs in the Netherlands ae the brown and the green frog. Some brown frogs are green, but I've been told you have to look at a spot on their cheek: the green frogs have a green spot, and the brown ones... indeed!

There's another difference. The brown ones are mumblers, compared to the green species. The green frogs really SCREAM!

Not everybody likes it. Their sound is like a screaming magpie with a megaphone. They start at the end of april and continue until october.

But... I love it! In september 2005, I finally go my little apartment, after almost 1 year waiting. My marriage exploded in the fall of 2004, but due to the lack of houses I had to wait 10 months before I found a home for myself and the 2 kids. One living room and 2 bedrooms, 75 square meters of freedom on the first floor, near water and a little park.

When I came in the apartment for the first time, I heard the frogs. And since then, that was the sound of relief. It was not easy to deal on my own with the problems that came my way, but after every winter, the frogs woke up and sang their song. And when the nights have a mild temperature, I open my window and balcony door to welcome the sound of the green frogs.

For other people one of the most annoying sounds there is. For me: the sound of summer, open doors, welcome, a new life, freedom, and: after every cold dark winter comes another summer...!

pic: "Kikker", Max Velthuijs

1940-1945 (in Dutch language)

2008-05-04T18:44:00.006+02:00

On May 4th the Netherlands remember the Dutch who fell in WW2 (since the 21st century: all in the world who gave their life for freedom) and on May 5th we celebrate that our country was freed from the Nazi regime (since the 21st century: freedom in common).

Today I heard this song again, sung by Gerard Cox. Text and music is from Jaap van der Merwe. I heard the song before and again, it grabbed me... (I try to translate it later)

Ballade van het Wonderorgel.

Krijg je een ouwe Rotterdammer
Eenmaal aan de praat
Dan maak je 'n goeie kans op het verhaal
Dat over 't orgel in die bios
Op de Hoogstraat gaat
Dat kennen ze zo'n beetje allemaal
Dat was een wonder
Bijzonder

Twee joodse landverhuizers
Hebben ruim een jaar gebouwd
Voordat dat ding geluid gaf, goed en wel
Maar toen,! Je wist niet wat je hoorde
Je werd warm en koud
Je zweefde, je kwam klaar, kreeg kippevel

Zo zwoel, zo dwepend
Meeslepend

Want dat orgel had een ziel
Die zong van-dik-hout-zaagt-men-planken
Tranen kreeg je in je ogen
En je wist niet of het kwam
Van 't janken
Van de lach
Of soms van het Wilhellemus-gevoel
Maar je wist
Jij zou beslist
Voor elk mooi doel
Je leven geven
't Orgel galmde heldenmoed
Moord en brand en bloed

Als horden ongecultiveerde
Indianen galoppeerden
Om te jagen op de scalp van Tom Mix
Als Harry Piel met Asta Nielsen in de struiken dook
Kon je die kamperfoelie horen, en nog ruiken ook
Dat orgel stond voor niks

't Orgel galmde heldenmoed
Liefde, seks en bloed

Je kreeg een jungle, waar de wilde
Beesten brulden, krijsten, gilden
Loeiden, sisten, kwinkeleerden als de hel
De Niagara waterval, de Orient Express
Een slagveld uit de Wereldoorlog en een jazz-orkes
Een kloosterklokkenspel

't Orgel galmde heldenmoed
Vroomheid, rampen, bloed

Een hele stad in lichterlaaie
Zeekastelen naar de haaien
Nou, dan gingen de registers effen open
De vlammen sloegen uit je hoofd
En menigeen heeft soms geloofd
Dat ie Op Hoop Van Zegen zelf was verzopen

't Orgel galmde heldenmoed
Moord en brand en bloed

Toch kwam de ergste gruwelfilm
Niet op het doek van 't huis
Uit de toverlantaren. Nee. Die kwam
Uit een blauwe lucht vol
Bommenwerpers met een hakenkruis
Loodrecht omlaag op 't hart van Rotterdam

Dat was veroordeeld
Tot voorbeeld

Eerst de ontploffingen
Toen de brand - Een helse baaierd van vuur
De molenaar aan het Oostplein deed
Wat ze al sinds de middeleeuwen doen
Bij brandgevaar
De wieken laten draaien
Dan waaien de vonken weg

Zijn molen bleef gespaard
Maar mensen, woonhuizen, kerken, fabrieken
Winkels, theaters
Hebben geen wieken

Zo is die bioscoop ontvlamd
En langzaam ingestort
Toneel. Balkon. De muren. Het plafond
Het wonderorgel kreeg de brokken
Op z'n toetsenbord
Het kermde, dat je 't buiten horen kon

Huiveringwekkend
Verrekkend

Want dat orgel had een ziel
Die angst en schrik en pijn verraadde
Eerst nog pianissimo
Een schietgebedje om genade
Maar bij al 't gedonder
Van de bommen
Is dit God ontgaan
Dus geen wonder
Dat ook geen piloot
Het heeft verstaan
Het hulpeloos schietgebedje raakte zoek
En het werd een vloek

In de Oppert lag een jongen heel stil
Op de stoep van wat zijn huis was geweest
Zijn horloge stond op tien voor half twee
Het ogenblik van de eerste voltreffer
Wie weet heeft hij meer geluk gehad dan honderden anderen
Voor wie de dood uren later pas definitief werd

Je kleren vlogen buiten
Van de hitte in de hens
In de Pannekoekstraat deed een kastelein
Het luik voor 't raam
Door dronken lallend, biddend
Zestig mensen
Tot ze door het vuur bedolven zijn

Laten we hopen
Straalbezopen

Drie dienstmeisjes van de Oud-Katholieke Kerk
Aan de Torenstraat dachten
In de kluis, daar zit je veilig voor de bommen
Dat was waar
Maar met een ingestorte kerk eroverheen
Krijg je achteraf de safe-deur niet meer open
En vervolgens kwam de brand
Toen later puinruimers de kluis opentrokken
Troffen ze op de bodem 1 gesmolten massa aan

De man die 's ochtends
Zijn gezin nog heelhuids achterliet
Vond half zijn Jonker Fransstraat platgelegd
En brulde naar de lucht
"Dit neemt ik godverdomme niet!"
Nooit is Gods naam misbruikt
Met zoveel recht

Voor zulke moorden
Bestaan geen woorden

Bij Douwe Egberts
Lag een pakhuis vol koffiebonen
Die werden voor de tweede keer gebrand
Toen ging het bluswater eroverheen
Dat aan de kook raakte
Zo komt het, dat de binnenstad dagenlang geurde
Niet alleen naar brandende vuilnisbelten
Maar ook schrijnend-gezellig naar een sterk bakkie troost
Bittere, schrale troost

Op de Noordsingel kreeg de gevangenis een voltreffer
Dus hebben ze de deuren opengezet
En in de ouwe diergaarde
Zijn de bloeddorstige beesten doodgeschoten
En de overige kooien opengezet
Dus apen en papegaaien
In de bomen langs de Westersingel
Kangoeroes op de Kruiskade
Struisvogels in 't Zwaanshals
De Zwart Janstraat

En in het brakke
Grachtje langs de Molenwaterweg
Een zeeleeuw. En giraffes op 't Hofplein
Maar de verraderlijkste beesten
Vlogen alweer ver
Op thuisreis naar hun holen bij Berlijn

Om zich te melden
Als helden

In de lege bioscoop
Heeft men het orgel horen zuchten
Vruchteloos probeerde 't
Met z'n trappelende paarden
Weg te vluchten
Brullend smeet het
Heel z'n waterval
Naar vuur en vlam
Stervend heeft het toen
De doodsklok nog geluid
Voor Rotterdam
Een vals akkoord van heldenmoed
Moord en brand en bloed
En 't wonderorgel zweeg
Voorgoed

For a very dear friend of mine...

2008-04-27T02:46:00.003+02:00

... who found out last week that... love stinks...
Hang on, dear L.!!!

LOVE STINKS
J. Geils Band

You love her
But she loves him
And he loves somebody else
You just can't win
And so it goes
Till the day you die
This thing they call love
It's gonna make you cry
I've had the blues
The reds and the pinks
One thing for sure

(Love stinks)
Love stinks yeah yeah

Two by two and side by side
Love's gonna find you yes it is
You just can't hide
You'll hear it call
Your heart will fall
Then love will fly
It's gonna soar
I don't care for any casanova thing
All I can say is

(Love stinks)
Love stinks yeah yeah

I've been through diamonds
I've been through minks
I've been through it all
Love stinks

Tim Burton, thanks!

2008-04-11T01:27:00.006+02:00

This afternoon DS and me went to Amsterdam, where Tim Burton did signings and interviews. And what a friendly man he is!!!!!!

We (my friend M, youngest DS L and and yours truly) met each other in the longest row I've seen in years! :-O
M was pretty much in front of it and I stayed with her.

We had a long wait, but finally the row started to move slowly and suddenly it was our turn! In groups of 10 persons (they counted L for 1/2 person, LOL!!!) we climbed the stairs and there was Tim, in a room with little light! Unfortunately I wasn;t in the right position to make a pic of M, but I managed to get one of L.

L had the Oyster boy book, and I had Burton on Burton to get signed. L told Tim in his best Pidgin-English (mind you, he's not yet 10 years old!) "I like the book very much" and Tim was so kind to him! He signed the book with the Burton-curl! I was very nervous and couldn't say much, except thank you. He shook my hand and signed my book. Again, he was very kind, but I think he was nervous too.

After that, M, L and me went to the theater for the interview. First 2 interviewers asked several questions. I was getting tired and I can't recall much anymore *blush* sorry for that... Thank God nu.nl wrote a good report about it!

Then the audience asked questions. L also asked something: are you going to make another movie for children?
Tim answered that, when he was a child, he thought the monstermovies he liked were for children, so Sleepy Hollow and Sweeney Todd were in his opinion perfect children movies...! :-O
Thank you, Tim...! :-D Those were the only movies L isn't allowed to see yet (he will be 10 in May) and he keeps asking me if he may see them too, now, because you told him...! :-P

We didn't stay to watch Edward Scissorhands (introduced by Tim), because it would be too late and too exhausting and I promised L to have dinner in a dimsum restaurant ;-) My friend M did stay and we said goodbye to each other after the interview.

Tim said several things about Johnny Depp. He told us it was not easy to tell the crew what he wants, doesn't know how to express exactly how he wants it, during shooting, but Johnny always understood him perfectly well.

L was very tired, but he was also impressed. He had to wait long, needed some translations during the interview, and it was hard to stay quiet and sit still for a boy like him, but he told me Tim was very friendly, and a bit like himself (fantasy world!), and when L is grown up he wants to become a producer, too! Awww, isn't he sweet?

Thanks, Tim, but also thanks, organisation of AFFF, for making my little boy so happy!!!!! This meant even more to him (and me) that I ever expected!

Ohm

2008-04-09T21:50:00.001+02:00

Thanks, Liz! OM

Namasté

2008-04-09T21:36:00.001+02:00

Namaste

...the result...!

2008-04-08T19:08:00.004+02:00

I decided to make only one, due to time & the fact that my ankle is not allright (it swells too much without supportstockings...). And here it is! I am so happy with it!!!!!

For all the mothers!

2008-04-08T10:09:00.002+02:00

Do like Anita Renfroe and turn your every day frustation into a Youtube-hit!

And here is an interview with Anita: http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=UHJN2PGm1Yo

That woman can't sing, but she's still great!!!

Today is T-Day

2008-04-08T07:22:00.007+02:00

At 1PM I will have the Ganesh(a) inked on my arm and ankle. Me, mad? Maybe.

But it's something I really want. I've analysed my thoughts about it for a long time now. The only thing that stopped me so far was other people's judgement (that stopped me with so many other things before). Not my fear of being sorry later. Not my fear of "damaging my body" (I hate my body, that let me down so often and doesn't show the person I really am, but I don't want to damage it... I want to give it something beautiful!).

The only excuse for not doing it, will be that judgement. Time to listen to myself more often and less to others! And maybe that is the main reason for putting the beautiful Ganesh(a) on my upper arm.

I don't think I will shock many people, because not many people will see my upper arm (too fat), but shocking people to make my statement is not what I want. I do it for my self.

But I will try to show a pic of the results...! BTW: I photoshopped the original a little, made the Om-sign a little bigger.

The original "Ganesha in Om" comes from www.madartworks.com.

Shine a Light

2008-04-06T22:26:00.002+02:00

Next week, the Stones-musicmovie will premier here in the Netherlands. The Stones are okay, I am not their biggest fan but I was considering going to the movie.

Then youngest DS (yes, the one who loves Tim Burton) heard a radio commercial about the movie and he wanted to go! He does have a remarkable mature music taste, but I was a bit unsure about taking him to this film.

My dear friend Liz saw the movie in the UK and told me it was child proof. I managed to get the soundtrack and let DS listen to it when we drove to my parents.

DS was impressed, even without knowing 75% of the songs and sooo wanted to see the movies...!

We won't go this week, because we have to meet a certain Mr.Burton... But I promise we will see this film anyway!

A 9 year old Stones fan... Good kid!

WE'RE MEETING TIM BURTON!!!

2008-04-06T22:19:00.002+02:00

YEAH!!!

The therapists of youngest DS (9) thought it was a good idea to go to Amsterdam together, because DS loves Tim Burton, ánd it would fit fine in the parent training (actual subject: doing nice things together).

Then, another problem occured. The (free) tickets were available on Tuesday and there was no way I could pick them up. And it was only 1 ticker per person...

I wrote the organisation and told them about DS, that I was a Tim Burton fan, but DS too, that he had permission to skip therapy and was so disappointed that it still seems impossible...

GUESS WHAT...!!! They mailed me back and told me they kept 2 tickets for us!!!!

I am very happy, but can you imagine his face when I told him the good news...???

The sacrifice of a mother...

2008-03-29T01:19:00.008+01:00

April 9th and 10th my hero Tim Burton is in Amsterdam! I wanted to be there the 10th (4PM)... But...

Who can pick up my 9 year old (who is a big fan, too...) from school and daytherapy and give him dinner then?

(...)

EDIT: PROBLEM SOLVED!!!

I will do it.

2008-03-29T01:12:00.005+01:00

I have been thinking about it for a long long time.

But I decided to do it.

The black one on my ankle:

The coloured one on my upper arm.

SO far, I didn't do it because other people don't like it. May judge me. But I decided to do it because I like it, and some people judge anyway.

It will happen April 8th!

The original "Ganesha in Om" comes from www.madartworks.com.

Ganesh(a)/O(h)m

2008-03-21T03:05:00.008+01:00

Since my divorce, I am seeing the Ganesh, a.k.a. Ganesha, everywhere. He appears in the most unexpected places. In magazines, stores, with people I just met (got a lottle statue from a co-worker last week)... Etcetera. No, it's not a coincidence anymore. It's looking for me.
Ganesha is a Hindu god, with the head of an elephant. Hindu's pray to him when they start something new, and you see him on crossroads. He can remove obstables or throw them on your path.

I also see the Ohm, a.k.a Aum or Om, everywhere, but not as much as the Ganesha. Ohm was the sound that created earth, life. And recently I discovered Ohm and Ganesha are connected.

I swore I never take a tattoo. But I am in doubt now. It is such a great way to express what is close to you! I would never take a big one, or one that everyone can see. But now I found such a beautiful combination of Ohm and Ganesha...

A tattoo doesn't have to be that big. And it is beautiful, it means a lot to me... But me, having a tattoo, on that not-so-beautiful body... My upper arm is so fat, my ankle can swell a lot in the summer :S... I am afraid I will look like white trash. That is not good for me, but also not for Ganesha. He deserves better.

But I want it... I sooo want it... This is the picture of it.

The original "Ganesha in Om" comes from www.madartworks.com.

Johnny Gangster

2008-03-21T02:48:00.005+01:00

At this moment, he has the worst haircut in Hollywood...

But it's for a good reason...! Johnny Depp is shooting a new movie at this moment. No weird pirates, homicide barbers or chocolatiers this time. He goes back to biography movies.
In the past he made great portraits of the worst moviemaker ever Ed Wood, Gonzo-journalist Raoul Duke a.k.a. Hunter S. Thompson, a completely new view on Fred Abberline, cocaine king George Jung, undercover agent Donnie Brasco (Joe Pistone), and (his best role ever) Libertine-poet John Wilmot, the Earl of Rochester.
At this moment, he is filming "Public Enemies", about the notorious bankrobber of the Thirties John Dillinger. And yes, male haircuts weren't very pretty then...

This week, he appeared in a USA-town where the real Dillinger was in the past. Fans gathered to get a glimpse of Depp and they weren't disappointed!
One of the best moments (there are several on Youtube) was the escape after the robbery, standing on the board of an original thirties car, shooting with a gun (rumour has it that is it genuine too), then going through the door into the back seat while the car drives (no stunt double!).
After shooting, he insisted (!) to meet his fans, talked to them and gave signatures.

Catlog

2008-03-04T00:02:00.004+01:00

Mr. Lee is a cat. But not an average cat. His master (oops, cats don't have masters!) tied a lightweight camera on him. That camera takes a picture every minute and shows us the life of an average cat...! His master (or whatever you may call him) made a photoblog with the pics Mr. Lee made... Interesting!

Paris for dummies, part two

2008-02-29T17:58:00.004+01:00

Our hotel was okay (Paris Hotel, 23 Rue Henry Monnier, arr. 9). Clean rooms, very friendly staff, simple but good breakfast. Perfect! There was Wifi, a blessing for my new laptop! We went to bed early, but before I closed my eyes I contacted my friends and family to let them know we were still alive ;-)

Next morning, we had breakfast with croissants, pain au chocolat, a piece of baguette and toast, plus chocolat (kids) and coffee (moi). Then we walked to the direction of the Moulin Rouge, where the open double decker buses of 'Open Tour' leave. The weather was not as good as Sunday, but still good enough to sit on the top deck!

It's the best way for noobs to discover Paris. You buy a ticket (29 euro for adults, 13 for kids) that is valuable for 2 days on the 4 routes (Montmartre, Center, Montparnasse and Bastille). You can step up and off when you want during those 2 days. Sometimes, when you want to get on the bus again, you have to wait some time, but it's a great way to see every famous part of Paris!

We took the Montmartre part (not very interesting, but since we were staying there...) and on the Place de la Madeleine, we went to the Downtown bus. And we didn't regret it!

Unfortunately we had rain on the 2nd day, but hey, we didn't melt...!

Arc de Triomphe

And yes, we saw the most famous Tourist parts! Not everything, that would take at least a week. If we hurry. We saw the Tour Eifel (didn't go on it... high!), Arc de Triomphe, Champs Elysées, Notre Dame (inside, too), Place de la Concorde...

to be continued

Paris, Paris, is the place to be...! Part one

2008-02-29T17:44:00.007+01:00

People who visit Paris often, will laugh about those tourists who spend their few days holiday in the main tourist traps. Well... SO WHAT!!! :-D

Yes, I have been in Paris last week, with both kids! They never been there, I've been there twice: in 1979 with school, and in 2006 on my way to Normandy. My kids told me in the past they wanted to see things like the Louvre and Tour Eiffel, and when I could book a cheap arrangement with a plane and a hotel... well, why not!

Last Sunday we left to Schiphol and took the plane to Paris Charles de Gaulle, the airport. I hadn't made up my mind yet about how to travel to the hotel. Train or taxi, it would depend on how I felt. The train won.

At station Gare du Nord I decided to take the taxi for the last mile. The price was not bad: in my hometown I have paid double in the past for the same distance!

We were too early to check in in the hotel, but no problem: we could leave the suitcase there. The weather was extreme well: 18 degrees Celcius, high for this time of year! We decided to walk to the Sacre Coeur. That was uphill, and I had to take it easy because I felt tired already, but hey, it was holiday, no rush! Slowly we went up the hill, took the little train for the last meters, and we made it!

Paris was lying at our feet!

Via Place du Tertre we went back.

Time flies...!

2008-01-13T03:17:00.000+01:00

The way to hell is paved with good intentions. I want to write blogs, I want to post pics, blah di blah di blah...
I want to write about how great my New Years Eve stay was. I met people I'll never meet again, enjoyed myself!
I want to write about my sudden new job (well, it is more like an extention of my old job... and it fits me like a glove!).
I want to write about the new old car I bought to go to my job... (first car in more than 2 years... A 15 year old Daihatsu Cuore, bright red!)

I want to write so much about my dear friends who went to Leicester Square last week for the Sweeney Todd Premiere and met Johnny Depp there...!
I want to write about my English friend Liz, who phoned me shortly before she met him, and managed to stay on the phone while he signed her... arm (yes, it is a tattoo now!).

I want to write about my aunt, who was so creative and lively when I was a kid... Who was just a shade of her old self the last time I met her... Who passed away last week...
I want to write about my 70 year old mom, who lost her SIL, but also a dear friend, in just a week time... Who has such a hard time to deal with getting older, who is still in good health, but see how friends and relatives pass away due to all kind of diseases...

But time... It goes so fast... too fast to put a pen to the paper and tell...

Happy New Year!

2008-01-02T15:14:00.000+01:00

Happy New Year! I hope all your wishes may come true (yes, even the naughty ones!)

One of my good intentions is to write more in the future. But there's so much to do and so little time...

I can write about my great New Years Eve in Egmond aan Zee, about little conversations I hear, about the beauty of things... but I am running like crazy and when the kids arrive back home again (this afternoon) and work starts (Friday) I need 36 hours in a day...

I can start with putting pics here from the great buffet I had on New Years Eve... It was amazing! But then I have to upload it first. And there's a suitcase with clothes waiting for the washing machine... A kitchen that needs a good cleaning... Emails that needs to be answered... Administration that needs to be done...

I need another week holiday...!!!

Problem solved...!

2007-12-17T02:34:00.000+01:00

It can be a real problem...

Cats are cute and cuddly, but also annoying. You can trip over them...! Especially in the dark. Many cat owners know that...

Scientists from South Korea have managed to clone glow-in-the-dark-cats...! So... no more shrieking cats in the middle of the night, because you kicked them by accident, while you tried to sneak to the bathroom for a midnight wee, or to the bedroom after going out too late with too much booze...!

This is a Dutch clip about it, but you don't need subtitling...

BTW: I don't know what is worse: growing up in a laboratory, or having an owner (do cats have owner, or do they own humans?) who kick them in the middle of the night...

Shocking Pratchett-news

2007-12-13T22:35:00.000+01:00

The amazing writer Terry Pratchett (a.k.a. Pterry on his own usenet-newsgroup) has a rare kind of Alzheimer, so he told us.

NOT FAIR! The man is only 59 and one of the most brilliant writers (Discworld) on earth!!!

Another thing to look forward too!

2007-12-07T01:37:00.000+01:00

Being frugal in financially low times (even when you know there's still money in the pipeline) is always rewarding. The pipeline I just mentioned, is finally about to release that money, but thanks to frugal living I have no debts to pay and can consider it a financial bonus!

I promised the DS's a few days in Paris. They didn't want Euro Disney (pfew!), but preferred the Louvre and the Tour Eifel. With a good schedule and preparation, 2 days (plus 2 days travel time) would have been enough.

But... then the pipeline slowly opened, including an unexpected bonus. At the same time I found out the cheap trains were all booked for our holiday time (end of February); that might be a disappointment but then I found a cheap (not much more expensive than the train) flight going to Paris, including a hotel at the edge of Paris Montmartre!

At the very same day I found out that my favourite job might need me more during the school hours (YAY! Too good to be true!) I booked 5 (!!!) days Paris, plus a flight from Amsterdam to Paris Charles De Gaulle (about 1 hr 15 min)!

I must make a holiday schedule now (that is necessary with 2 aspergerboys). Prepare the trip from day to day. From hour to hour. But that is also part of the pre-fun!

Wow! I have so much to look forward to! First, the hotel arrangement (another thing I got cheap with a lot of luck) at New Years Eve. Then, 3 weeks later, my dear friend Liz staying here including our visit to Sweeney Todd (with Johnny Depp... that movie opens when she is here!). And then, a month later, Paris, by plane, Montmartre!

With a little help...

2007-11-30T12:29:00.000+01:00

It's really touching to discover that, in times of questions, sorrow, worry, whatever, so many people want to think with you about possible solutions.

Recently I wrote about oldest DS, who is diagnosed Asperger too (after years of struggle...), but too old for children's therapy and treatment. For adolescence treatment the waiting lists are so long, that the only solution seems to be an institute where he will live for about a year or so.

That breaks my heart. The situation at home is very difficult, with a teenager who is stuck in anger, sadness, extreme moodswings and that damned Asperger, but it's so unbearable that I maybe have to miss him such a long time...

F*ck the failing system for boys like him, in this country! He is very bright but he can;t go to the right high school because there are just a few of those! He can't have day therapy anymore like his brother because he's too old! And good therapy for his age is out of reach due to the waiting lists...!

But... the everlasting support from friends is really doing me good! Thanks, friends! Without people like you I didn't know anymore how to go on..!

Johnny in London

2007-11-30T12:13:00.001+01:00

It was a busy week for Johnny Depp and Tim Burton. Time to go to London (I am so sorry, Liz, that you just missed them!) and promote Sweeney Todd. Rumour has it that Johnny had the flu. He did look tired and skinny indeed, and that worried me... He's still beautiful, but the years have hit him hard, this last year. I hope everything is okay and it's just that plague that hits everybody who's over 40 (he's aging beautiful, by the way, but a bit too fast).

Some photo-sniper caught him in a London toy shop, together with his pal Tim Burton. Buying christmasshoppings? Hey, Johnny, is that a box with "The Simpsons"? Do you also sing "Spider Pig, Spider Pig" with your children...?

And there were many interviews. Answering the same old answers over and over again... One of the interviewers made a mistake. And oops... Suddenly thát interview became one of the funniest Johnny ever did (thanks to Tim)!

Warning about the coffee: don't try this at home! :D

Click here, for the interview!

Crying in the rain

2007-11-23T19:10:00.000+01:00

I haven't written much recently. Personal issues. Thanks to a 12 year old child with Asperger syndrome (diagnosis official since last week) and my fight for him, my crying for help, my concern about the present and the future.

His 9 year old brother got his diagnosis last summer, and isn't too old for special therapy and help, he has that since 2 months now and he is doing extremely well!

But oldest is too old for that. I couldn't start earlier because we needed the bloody diagnosis.

I've been screaming for help, "there's something with this kid!" for about 10 years and this year we finally got help... Too late? His behaviour is worsening by the day. A mixture of Asperger and asolescence. Screaming, tantrums, and thanks to the Asperger they last and last... And it makes him more and more sad because he can't control himself.

Why, why did no one from the professional help listen to me before it was too late...

There is therapy for adolescents, but the waiting lists are too ridiculous for words. And we? We fight on.

I don't want to stick in my negative feelings. I must be happy about the improve youngest DS makes. But I can't. I feel beaten. By the system. By the waiting list. By the lack of support in the past (I have it now but they can't do much now).

I got the diagnosis "you're about the burn-out" for myself. But what can I do? When someone gets a burnout from work, he can decide to take another job or (better) some rest. But a mother who has a burn out after fighting for diagnosis and against red tape and waiting lists for years? Well... I do my crying in the rain. Crying for this beautiful boy, who is in more and more trouble and I can't help him...

I need a good kick in the @ss, I know!

I'll never let you see
The way this broken heart is hurting me
I've got my pride
And I know how to hide
All the sorrow and pain
I'll do my crying in the rain

If I wait for cloudy skies
You won't know the rain from the tears in my eyes
You'll never know
That I still love you so
Though the heartaches remain
I'll do my crying in the rain

Raindrops falling from Heaven
Could never wash away my misery
(...)
Raindrops falling from Heaven
Could never wash away my misery
Since we're not together
I pray for stormy weather
To hide these tears I hope you never see

Some day when my crying's done
I'm gonna wear a smile and walk in the sun
I may be a fool
But 'til then darling you'll
Never see me complain
I'll do my crying in the rain
To hide these tears I hope you never see

Some day when my crying's done
I'm gonna wear a smile and walk in the sun
I may be a fool
But 'til then darling you'll
Never see me complain
I'll do my crying in the rain

Blood!

2007-11-06T14:43:00.000+01:00

Johnny Depp can say things in such a way, that you can SEE it happen...! This quote comes from Entertainment Weekly and is quoted everywhere now. Warning: don't read this while eating something with syrup!

Johnny Depp quickly grew sick of the sight of blood on the set of new musical Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber Of Fleet Street - because it was everywhere.
Director Tim Burton insisted on a bloody mess as his ghoulish barber slashed clients in gory scenes.
Depp says, "I remember everyone except me being covered in plastic trash bags. There'd be a countdown: 'Three, two, one... action!' And then blammo... the great deluge. It tasted kind of like a Karo-syrupy sort of thing. It was oily and it was dangerous, slippery. You'd see these big English grips, tiptoeing through the swamp of blood."

Yes, dear, I can see ánd taste it!

A fairytale...

2007-11-06T12:47:00.000+01:00

A far more accurate account of the events of that fateful morning.....

Baby bear goes downstairs, sits in his small chair at the table, and he looks into his small bowl. It is empty. 'Who's been eating my porridge?' he squeaks.

Daddy Bear arrives at the big table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big bowl and it is also empty. 'Who's been eating my porridge?' he roars.

Mummy Bear puts her head through the serving hatch from the kitchen and yells:

'For God's sake, how many times do we have to go through this with you idiots?
It was Mummy Bear who got up first.
It was Mummy Bear who woke everyone in the house.
It was Mummy Bear who made the coffee.
It was Mummy Bear who unloaded the dishwasher from last night and put everything away.
It was Mummy Bear who went out in the cold early morning air to fetch the newspaper and croissants.
It was Mummy Bear who set the damn table.
It was Mummy Bear who put the bloody cats out, cleaned the litter boxes, gave the cats their food, and refilled their water.
And now that you've decided to drag your sorry bear-asses downstairs and grace Mummy Bear with your grumpy presence, listen carefully, because I'm only going to say this once...

I HAVEN'T MADE THE F*****G PORRIDGE YET!

Problem solved!

2007-11-03T16:17:00.000+01:00

I found the answer to my problem this afternoon: a 2-night-stay in a hotel at sea! Including buffet, swimming pool and sauna.

Decadent? Maybe. But I think I deserve it, after everything I have done this year..!

We are beautiful!

2007-10-31T21:10:00.000+01:00

Walks in to the room
Feels like a big balloon
I said, 'Hey girls you are beautiful!'
Diet coke and a pizza please
Diet coke, I'm on my knees
Screaming 'Big girl you are beautiful!'

You take your skinny girls
Feel like I'm gonna die
Cos a real woman
Needs a real man is why

You take your girl
And multiply her by four
Now a whole lotta woman
Needs a whole lot more

Get yourself to the Butterfly Lounge
Find yourself a big lady
Big boy coming around
And they'll be calling you baby

No need to fantasise
Since I worked on my phrases
A watering hole
With the girls around
And curves in all the right places

Big girls you are beautiful
Big girls you are beautiful
Big girls you are beautiful
Big girls you are beautiful

(...)

And he even used a woman with my size in the clip, not just "a bit bigger" girls!!! Yeah, Mika rules!!!

A little more than 2 months to go...

2007-10-28T23:24:00.000+01:00

...and then it's New Year's Eve. And I don't want to nag, but... I hate it.

It's my 3rd time since the divorce and it was a bit shocking to discover how strong, independend, me, felt like Remi: all alone. In the past, New Years Eve was the time of year when I looked back, talked about the good and bad things, and even in a not-so-good marriage that was okay. Now I miss the talk. Looking back on a year that is almost history. Eating and drinking together.

The kids want to be with their dad (he has fireworks), my friends and brother have their own family, the neighbors are out or also have their own friends and/or family. And then it's not so great to find out that you have a lot of friends, but not at New Years Eve.

Of course I am welcome at my parents, and I love them a lot, but it feels a bit pathetic, too. I don't know how to explain it. A 44-year-old celebrating New Years Eve with her parents, while the rest of the world has their own family, friends, etcetera. They're good to me, but celebrating new years eve with those german tv-shows on tv, no. Not on that evening.

I tried to book a little holiday appartment or hotel room somewhere by the sea, but it's not available then, or too expensive. And New Years Eve in Amsterdam with many people seems great, but how do I get home after it?

I would love to listen to the Radio 2 Top 2000 with more people who love that too! So... if someone in the Netherlands know about a New Years Eve Top 2000 meeting?

And if that isn't available? Well, I think I must find an alternative way to wait for midnight. The thought of saying "happy new year" to no one myself again while the rest of the world is celebrating it together, isn't very nice. And that's why I am already worrying for something that is over 2 months later.

I can live on my own very well! But that special day, that evening... That is difficult. Very difficult.

Update

2007-10-17T22:02:00.001+02:00

Youngest DS is on special school and therapy for 4 weeks now. And it's amazing how much he already learned!!!

The first week was very hard for him. He missed the old school, his friends, and came into a whole new world with new people and new rules. But after a very bad day with lots of tantrums and tears, followed by a good talk, he improved amazingly!

We have a long way to go. You can't heal Asperger, but we can learn how to deal with it! He can, so can we!

The future suddenly looks a bit more promising...!

Oldest DS has to go to a special high school next year summer. He is very intelligent, but due to the idea that people with ASS can;t learn, there are't many schools for him... He has to go to more simple education before he finally can go to that special gymnasium, miles and miles away from home. He can't go to that school immediately because if he wants to, there's a 3 year waiting list. When he first go to the simple special school, it's easier to get access. It's a weird world for people with ASS, who don't have learning problems, but still need special care that normal high schools can't give...

We found a school. And oldest DS was very disappointed, but he understood the reason why he couldn't go to gymnasium next year, but first had to pass the simple high school.

We looked for information about this high school and to his surprise, the building was the same as where his old school (before we moved house and school, due to my divorce) was! That gave him a good feeling!

A few days after this... the school burned down...!

Born to hand jive (18+...!)

2007-10-17T21:40:00.000+02:00

Copy-pasted from DollyMix

According to a survey by CupidBay.com, British and Irish men masturbate, on average, seven times per week, and women only twice a week. Across Great Britain, the statistics vary a little, as English men wank away eight times a week; Scottish and Welsh men seven times a week, and Irish men *only* five.

The Scottish women take the cake as they do it five times a week, whereas the English women masturbate twice a week. However, Welsh and Irish women come in dead last at only once a week.

My favorite part of the survey was where people shared where they masturbate. Unsurprisingly, 69% of men get off in front of their computer, although 19% admitted to having a *special moment* in their work toilet. Women, however, seemed to be more traditionalists as 58% have a go at it in bed, or in the bath.

While this survey is interesting, it's not exactly new information that 75% of men use pornographic images to get off, while 80% of women said they "thought about someone they knew". (Although I highly doubt any of them actually know Johnny Depp.)

HAH!

Sweeney Todd is coming...!

2007-10-11T12:58:00.000+02:00

Finally, the trailer of the Sweeney Todd-movie with Johnny Depp, is available!

And for the people who wonder if Johnny can really sing...: watch and listen!

Another thing to look forward to...!

2007-09-20T01:43:00.000+02:00

... my English friend Liz, visiting me next year!

I'll show you Amsterdam, serve you boerenkool and rijsttafel, cover you with stroopwafels and give you GOOD coffee!

How to spend an evening...

2007-09-20T01:42:00.000+02:00

...google on "art nouveau" or "jugendstil"...

Wow, it's so beautiful!!!

Sad day

2007-09-20T01:22:00.000+02:00

After all those years and waiting lists, the news came suddenly, several weeks ago. Youngest DS will be going to a special school for kids with things like autism related challenges at September 20st.

That is tomorrow.

Last week... he slipped into denial. He has seen the school, and the special daycare he will visit. And he liked it. But leaving a place that you know, even when it's a schoolclass where 95% of the pupils won't accept you because you're different, is hard, very hard.
And it's almost impossible when you have something autism related.

This morning, after I woke up, I went to his room to wake him up. He is a good sleeper and it always takes several minutes, but this time, I found him in his bed, sobbing.
He ate his breakfast... sobbing.
He went to school... sobbing...

I know. He has to go through this. It's always hard to leave a situation you know, even when you don't feel well in that situation.

He survived today. Tomorrow comes another challenge: the first day at the new school. Another scary situation. And DS has only one wish: this is a nightmare and tomorrow I go to my old class again.
I am so sorry... I can't take his pain away...

Asperger sucks. Sometimes it's a challenge, but at days like this it just sucks. Big time. And as a mother, I feel bloody helpless...

That time of year...

2007-09-14T11:46:00.000+02:00

It's medio september, time for my annual friends-weekend! For the 6th time, we (a group of e-mailfriends) have a child- and hubby-less weekend somewhere in a Dutch holiday-resort. We have in common that we have children and we're together since 1998.

In my daily life, I don't have much social contacts. People in my neighborhood are busy, have another kind of life, those things happen. And I am a work-at-home-mum so I don't have co-workers. But thanks to these friends all over the country, I am not alone!

I remember last summer, when I was on holiday and youngest DS was rushed to the hospital. Two of my dear friends live near that hospital, they helped me, came as soon as possible and gave me company!

When I was moving house after my divorce, some of them came to help me painting.

When I was still in my marriage, they listened to me, endless, with lot of patience.

People who think the Internet will give you a poor social life, are sooo wrong... Internet saved me, years ago, when I was really alone and had no friends at all. I've met very interesting people, like this mailing group, and also women from the Johnny-Depp-fanlists, and several of them are close friends now!

Thanks to them, I visit places I never went before (annual weekends like this, but also my trip to the UK and a weekend to the cinema in Antwerpen), and "lonely" is a word that doesn't exist anymore!

Yes!!!

2007-09-06T00:02:00.000+02:00

I know this movie is pretty yucky, but made in such an over-the-top way (according to many people) that it's funny again...! And I love Rodriguez... And finally it's here in Almere!

I also want to see the other movie that goes with the grondhouse-thing, made by Tarantino.

But first I want to see Planet Terror!

One problem: I don't want to go alone... Volunteers...?

Good and better

2007-09-01T17:39:00.000+02:00

Good news this week: the local library had all the episodes of Monty Python's Flying Circus on dvd to rent!

Better news: my 12 year old DS saw it and became a fan!

I knew he must have some of my gens, too...!

A great artist!

2007-08-27T18:55:00.001+02:00

His name is Niels Blenderman. He's born in 1984, mentally challenged, and has poor eyes. And I am impressed by his art!

This afternoon I saw an exhibition of him in the local hospital. It's great!

His hero is Basquiat. I am not surprised...!

I am glad this young man can make his dream come true: being a real artist!!! And yes, I am a little jealous of it... I want to be that, too! But I don't think I am that good...

Reanimated...

2007-08-27T18:20:00.000+02:00

My pc-problem is over! Thanks for mailing me, it really helped a lot!!!

Dust and dirt has affected the ventilator on the graphic card and meanwhile, that card has got some damage. I replaced the card and cleaned the pc. What a mess...!!!

A good tip: put the vacuum cleaner once a week against the ventilator holes in the pc...!

Congratulations!

2007-08-25T11:47:00.000+02:00

And yesterday I found this poster! There will be a 10 minute trailer when Tim Burton receives his award (in Venice). I hope some of that "leeks" to internet, because we have to wait till January... This is torture!

Early birthday present...

2007-08-22T01:10:00.000+02:00

I don't have my birthday yet... I'll turn 44 (oops) at September 7th.

But Liz didn't want to take any risk. Sometimes it takes some weeks before a packet arrives by mail...!

Not this time! This morning the postman rang (only once :) ) and gave me my birthday present!!!

Liz gave me permission to open it, and... WOW!!!!

Double-dvd GRease including the singalong-version!

Three Johnny Depp fridge magnets!

And... this delicious book...!

Plus some other things...!

Liz, you're too good for me...!

Very important lesson...!

2007-08-19T19:45:00.000+02:00

Quote from the book "Burton on Burton", about Tim Burton:

"I remember going through art school, and you've got to take life drawing, and it was a real struggle. Instead of encouraging you to express yourself to draw like you did when you were a child, they start going by the rules of society. They say , "No. No. You can't draw like this. You have to draw like this."

And I remember one day I was so frustrated - because I love drawing, but actually I'm not that good at it. But one day something clicked in my brain. I was sitting sketching and I thought, "Fuck it, I don't care if I can draw or not. I like doing it."

And I swear to God, from one second to the next I had freedom which I hadn't had before. From that point on, I didn't care if I couldn't make the human form look like the human form. I didn't care if people liked it."

Help!!!

2007-08-19T12:37:00.000+02:00

Iemand een idee hoe ik die blauwe strepen van mijn scherm krijg?

En dat is nog maar een klein probleem met mijn pc! Sinds ik terugben van vakantie, doet-ie gek. Start moeilijk op (met lawaai en blauwe strepen die dan steeds erger worden), belt steeds in (moet-ie niet doen, ik ben al ingebeld), is traag...

Virusscannen, defrag, cache leegmaken, ik heb het allemaal al gedaan. En inmiddels krijg ik het steeds benauwder, want zonder pc heb ik simpel weg... geen inkomen...

Idea, anyone, how to get rid of the blue stripes on my screen?

And that's just a minor problem with my pc! Since I'm back from holiday, it's acting weird. PRoblems with starting up (noise and blue stripes that grow worse until I can;t read anything...), trying to dial (no need to, I was already online), slow...

Virusscan, defrag, empty cache, been there, done that. And I feel worse and worse, because without pc I can't earn my money...!

Jos Brink overleden

2007-08-17T21:04:00.000+02:00

Today, Dutch entertainer Jos Brink passed away at the age of 65. He wa sknown for his deep voice, his smile, his silly humour when he did tv-quizzes (and getting away with it), his fight for the right of homosexuals and his work for the church, in his own unique way.

Elke veertigplusser is met hem opgegroeid: Jos Brink. Vandaag is hij overleden. Een kleine maand geleden werd bekend gemaakt dat hij uitgezaaide kanker had. Vandaag viel definitief het doek.

Jos Brink werd vooral bekend via de Avro, met zijn pismelige humor in Babbelonië en later Wedden dat, waarin hij met "kroepoekje" Sandra Reemer een gouden duo vormde. Zijn humor balanceerde gevaarlijk op het randje van fout, maar hij kwam er altijd mee weg.

Al in de jaren zeventig draaide hij niet om zijn homoseksualiteit heen. Dat hij met zijn latere echtgenoot Frank Sanders samenleefde, was geen geheim. Toch werd hij, net als Robert Long, nooit de "typische nicht" (wat Paul de Leeuw soms weer wel heeft).

Daarnaast werkte hij als pastor en ving hij jonge mensen op als zijn eigen kinderen.

Jos Brink werd ook beroemd met Tekstpierement (musical, cabaret) dat anno 2007 wel wat oubollig aan kan doen, maar dan opeens weer opmerkelijk actueel kan zijn. En hij schreef boeken, ook autobiografische boekjes over zijn leven, waarin Frank en de katten vaak centraal staan.

Tenslotte werd Jos Brink beroemd vanwege zijn kus aan Koningin Juliana (destijds voorpaginanieuws!) en zijn eigen weddenschappen in Wedden Dat, waarin hij zich soms geweldig in de nesten werkte. Maar... toen hij ooit een weddenschap moest doen, kort nadat een jongetje was verongelukt dat enkele afleveringen eerder in de show was geweest, zag hij er van af, omdat hij door dat jongetje had beseft dat het leven te kostbaar was. Enkele jaren geleden werd Frank Sanders ernstig ziek door longkanker. Hij genas hiervan, tot opluchting van velen, want Jos en Frank zijn erg geliefd. Maar Jos kon deze rotziekte helaas niet overwinnen.

Sleeping in the belltower...

2007-08-17T13:27:00.000+02:00

The church Vituskerk in Hilversum (The Netherlands) is about 110 years old. In the eighties, I lived almost next to that church.
I found this video on the www.
Hans Hoogenboom (reporter Gooi & Eemlander) wanted to sleep in a special place. A cemetery? Under a bridge? Or... a church?
After some talking the church gave him permission to spend a night in the about 90 meter high belltower with the 6 bells. He didn't sleep at the highest point, but at 21 meter. Only a ceiling seperated him from the bells...!
The stair was 104 steps long. Then he entered the belltower where he spent the night...

Prachtig gedicht

2007-08-16T11:07:00.000+02:00

(sorry, this one it too hard to translate... I can't "catch" the feeling when I translate it...)

Source: http://www.tekstdichter.nl/
Painting: www.annierovers.nl We vissen dicht onder de kust
de donder rolt over de dijk
de zee is zo zwart als de nacht
waarmee ik de lucht vergelijk
het water gaat woedend tekeer
het kookt en het kolkt en het raast
het roer gehoorzaamt niet meer

De Waddenzee siddert en beeft
verwoestend als pakijs dat kruit
de kotter breekt bijna in twee
o god, ik sta doodsangsten uit
de bliksem schiet wild in het rond
de lucht breekt met heidens kabaal
het schip bonkt over de grond

O de zee, de zee
van het golvend gevaar
wat ben je toch met me van plan
o de zee, zwarte zee,
onberekenbaar
weet dat ik niet zonder je kan

Uit alle macht klem ik me vast
de zondvloed komt over me heen
ik hoor iemand schreeuwen om hulp
ben dan weer minuten alleen

Met de zee, de zee
van het golvend gevaar
wat ben je toch met me van plan
o de zee, zwarte zee,
onberekenbaar
weet dat ik niet zonder je kan

Het onheil verliest nu zijn kracht
het noodweer trekt weg over zee
mijn bed daar verlang ik nu naar
we brengen ons quotum niet mee

Van de zee, van de zee
van het golvend gevaar
wat ben je toch met me van plan
o de zee, zwarte zee,
onberekenbaar
weet dat ik niet zonder je kan

De bui gromt wat na, het wordt licht
doorweekt waag ik mij op het dek
het zout bijt me in het gezicht
het luik naar 't vooronder zit dicht
de zee deint nog na, grijs als lood
ik roep maar een antwoord blijft uit
ik ben alleen op de boot

Met de zee, de zee
van het golvend gevaar
wat ben je toch met me van plan
o de zee, zwarte zee,
onberekenbaar
weet dat ik niet zonder je kan

First pics Sweeney Todd!

2007-08-13T19:10:00.001+02:00

Finally, pictures from Sweeney Todd, the new Johnny Depp-movie that will hit the theatre January 2008!
It looks great, and with Tim Burton behind the wheel it can't go wrong!
Johnny will be singing, and his voice is approved by Mr.Sondberg himself. Can't wait...!

I know some Depp-fans who can't stand the idea of a vicious, murdering Johnny (never seen Once Upon A Time In Mexico?) but I am one of those fans who can't wait! This week the trailer will be shown in the States. And I hope in Europe, too...!

Click here for a bigger pic of the poster.

Yes, I survived the holidays...!

2007-08-12T13:07:00.001+02:00

I sooo hate myself now, for not buying that Johnny Depp portrait, on Leicester Square...!

London was great! And a few weeks later I went to Ameland (a little Dutch island) with the kids.

I'll tell more about it later... there's a pile of laundry that needs to be done and a lot of luggage I have to unpack...!

And I haven't been in the allotment for 3 weeks, I think it's a disaster there... Due to the bad weather this summer, everything was rotting away, except the weed... I'll start with that this afternoon...!

See you soon!

London here we come!

2007-07-11T01:10:00.000+02:00

Finally, Thursday I'll be there!

Here we'll sleep...

Another art site

2007-06-29T23:04:00.000+02:00

I was at the hairdresser this afternoon. There were tv-screens with advertising and little reports about art, fashion and trends.

One of the reports was about v-i-a-v-i-a, an artist who has been approached by Levi's.

I like him!

I like this!

2007-06-29T10:09:00.000+02:00

What a pity this art gallery is so far away... I love it!

Lost and found

2007-06-29T00:41:00.000+02:00

Years ago, in a not-so-good time in my life, someone gave me this text. I know it sounds a bit soggy, but it gave me comfort...

I lost it, later. And this evening, by coincidence, I found it somewhere on the WWW!

Max Ehrmann - Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.

Dutch translation

Wees kalm temidden van het lawaai en de haast en bedenk welk een vrede er in stilte kan heersen.
Sta op goede voet met andere mensen zonder jezelf geweld aan te doen, zeg je waarheid rustig en duidelijk en luister naar anderen; ook zij vertellen hun verhaal.
Mijd luidruchtige en agressieve mensen; zij belasten de geest. Wanneer je je met anderen vergelijkt zou je ijdel en verbitterd kunnen worden want er zullen altijd grotere en kleinere mensen zijn dan jezelf.
Geniet zowel van wat je bereikt hebt als van je plannen.
Blijf belangstelling houden voor je eigen werk, hoe nederig dat ook moge zijn; het is een werkelijk bezit in het veranderlijke fortuin van de tijd.
Betracht voorzichtigheid bij het zaken doen, want de wereld is vol bedrog.
Maar laat dit je niet verblinden voor de bestaande deugd; veel mensen streven hoge idealen na en overal is het leven vol heldendom.
Wees jezelf. Veins vooral geen genegenheid. Maar wees evenmin cynisch over de liefde, want bij alle dorheid is zij eeuwig als het gras.
Volg de loop der jaren met gratie; verlang niet naar een tijd die achter je ligt.
Kweek geestkracht om bij onverwachte tegenslag beschermd te zijn, maar verdriet jezelf niet met spookbeelden. Vele angsten worden uit vermoeidheid en eenzaamheid geboren.
Leg je een gezonde discipline op, maar wees daarbij lief voor jezelf. Je bent een kind van het heelal, niet minder dan de bomen en de sterren, je hebt het recht hier te zijn en al is het je al of niet duidelijk, toch ontvouwt het heelal zoals het zich ontvouwt en zo is het goed.
Heb daarom vrede met God, hoe je ook denkt dat hij moge zijn, houdt vrede met je ziel in de lawaaierige verwarring van het leven.
Met al zijn klatergoud, somberheid en vervlogen dromen is dit nog steeds een prachtige wereld.
Wees voorzichtig. Streef naar geluk.

Max Ehrmann

Rest in peace, major!

2007-06-25T18:54:00.000+02:00

Pic: www.legerdesheils.nl

I don't think Major Alida Bosshardt was world famous. That is a pity, she deserved it.

Alida Bosshardt was born at June 13th 1913 in Utrecht (The Netherlands). At age 18 she went to the Salvation Army and loved the simple way they brought the Christian faith to the people.

She worked for the Salvation Army in a children's home in Utrecht. In 1933 she went to Rotterdam, one year later to Amsterdam. In the Dutch capital she saw the poverty among children, homeless people, addicted and prostitutes.

During World War 2 she was in the Resistance, worked in an "underground" children's home and gave Jewish children foster parents. The Salvation Army was forbidden during the German occupation. The Germans took her to prison, but she escaped.

Major Bosshardt wondered why the Salvation Army didn't care about prostitutes and homeless people in the Amsterdam Red Light District (De Wallen). In October 1948 she got 100 Dutch gulden to start a project for them. She opened a center, where Salvation Army-soldiers worked, they collected money to help the people on De Wallen. In the center, they gave shelter to homeless people.

Her work got attention by press and TV. She became a Dutch VIP and many people admired and respected her because of her good work and her very modest personality. ,br.She never judged people. But she also spoke about her personal doubts in life.

She deeply regretted the fact she never got married and had a family life and admitted she felt lonely.

In the Sixties, she took crown princess (now Queen) Beatrix incognito with her, disguised as a Salvation army soldier. Together they sold the "Strijdkreet" (the magazine of the SA) and helped the poor, homeless and prostitutes of Amsterdam.

The major (who was, in fact, lieutenant-colonel) was deeply beloved in The Netherlands. Everybody loved her. The love for this remarkable woman even grew after a tv-show called "Villa Felderhoff". In that program, Rik Felderhoff invites two Dutch VIP's to a French house. Those two VIP's are always completely opposites. He invited Major Bosshardt with Dutch singer/artist Herman Brood, known for his controversial way of life and multiple addictions (he committed suicide in 2001).

Thanks to these two people, that edition of Villa Felderhoff was one of the most beloved editions. The Major, who was in her eighties, helped Brood with cleaning him in the bath tub, while the "Rock 'n Roll Junkie" helped her out of the swimming pool. When he tried to provoke her with dropping his pants, she simply said "that was not necessary", without feeling hurt or offensed.

Her health was worsening the last years and last winter she announced that she had a feeling she won't live much longer. And she was right.

Today, this remarkable woman who did so much for the poor, even after her retirement in 1978, died at the age of 94.

Housekeeping tips...

2007-06-23T02:54:00.000+02:00

I haven't been online much this month. Too much housework... I should have read there tips earlier...! :D

1. It is time to clean out the refrigerator when something closes the door from the inside.

2. If it walks out of your refrigerator, let it go!

3. The best mini-vac for an after meal clean up is the dog.

4. Keep it clean enough for healthy, dirty enough for happy.

5. Never make fried chicken in the nude.

6. Do not engage in unarmed combat with a dust bunny big enough to choke the vacuum cleaner.

7. You make the beds, you do the dishes, and six months later you have to start all over again.

8. If guys were suppose to hang clothes up, door knobs would be bigger.

9. My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.

10. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.

11. Simplify... Hire a maid.

12: My second favourite household chore is ironing. My first being Hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.

13. I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.

14. I am a marvellous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house.

15. Cobwebs artfully draped over lampshades reduce the glare from the bulb, thereby creating a romantic atmosphere. If your husband points out that the light fixtures need dusting, simply look affronted and exclaim, "What? And spoil the mood?"

16. When writing your name in the dust on the table, omit the date.

17. If dusting is REALLY out of control, simply place a showy urn on the coffee table and insist that "THIS is where Grandma wanted us to scatter her ashes..."

Youngest DS is very brave!

2007-06-12T01:34:00.000+02:00

Last time I wrote about the stolen bicycle of youngest DS (9), and his fear to ride his new bike (too large, handbreaks in stead of footbreaks...). I saw a lot of troubles coming...

But here's another prove that ex-DH and me are better parents when we're living apart.

He came here yesterday afternoon to repair the bike of youngest DS. And then he took time to teach youngest DS to cycle... again.

Everybody who taught his or her child to ride a bicycle knows what that means. Running behind a swinging bike, ready to catch your child when (not if) it looses balance... Some parents think this is the ultimate parenting, I, personally, think my lungs will explose... :S
So I was very grateful that ex-DH would do this!

After that, I took over. I promised DS some candy is he went to the local grocrey with me. About 1 kilometer away. The poor boy almost wet his pants with fear, but... he did it!!!

I am so proud of him!!!

Bicycle thieves...

2007-06-10T03:20:00.001+02:00

I am so sick of those bicycle thieves in this country!!!

Youngest DS got a new bike for his birthday, last month. No, don't worry, that one isn't stolen!
But his new bike was much larger than the old one and DS was scared to use the new one... so he still used the old one.

And that old bike is stolen now!!! And I'm sooo pissed about it!!!

All I can do is helping DS with getting used to his new bike. That is like teaching a toddler how to use a bicycle: a lot of running. And my lungs won't allow that. And I can't just say to him "now stop nagging and get on that bike." Asperger, remember?

I may not wish bad things to someone, but I hope the thief will learn what lung emphysem is, including being a single parent with an Asperger child who just lost his bike before he is used to the new one!

Man vs woman in the shower...

2007-06-10T03:09:00.000+02:00

The funmail about the difference between men and women in the shower is as old as Metusalah. It's about time someone made a video of that...!

Favorite toy video :)

2007-06-07T08:28:00.000+02:00

Okay, it's sooo over-17-rated, but it's too funny not to share it!

Click here...!

Old age rules!

2007-06-07T01:43:00.000+02:00

I read this in the Dutch NRC-Handelsblad online...

Old aged pensioners made their own version of My Generation (The Who). Okay, The Who is 60+, but the OAP's who recorded their version still could be their parents! Singer Alf Carretta is 90 years old, drummer Buster Martin 100 and the average age of the band (of 40 people) is 78 years.

BBC-journalist Tim Samuels was touched by the circumstances many OAP's live in. He took some of them to the Abbey Road Studio and recorded the song.

The clip is on Youtube. Roger Daltrey is about 63 years old now, but I wonder if he still had the same power as these people! Highlight: the "rollators" crossing Abbey Road and the final scene of the clip!

Great!!!

Need a laugh...?

2007-05-31T20:10:00.000+02:00

On a day like today (I had to decide that it's the best that youngest DS goes to a special school and daycare, due to his AS-condition; he has Asperger) I need a good laugh to kick my ass and go on. And on the right moment, this one came in the mailbox:

A Florida senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-75, pushing the pedal even more.

Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw the highway patrol behind him, blue lights flashing and siren blaring.

He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought, "What am I doing? I'm too old for this," and pulled over to await the Trooper's arrival.

Pulling in behind him, the Trooper walked up to the Corvette, looked at his watch and said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is Friday. If you can give me a reason for speeding that I've never heard before, I'll let you go."

The old gentleman paused. Then said, "Years ago, my wife ran off with a Florida State Trooper. I thought you were bringing her back." "Have a good day, Sir," replied the Trooper.

At World's End

2007-05-25T16:12:00.001+02:00

I saw the new Pirates last Wednesday! And it's great! I'll write more about it later, because it's too busy now...

But I love to quote Beth from one of the mailing lists about it... just a little spoiler:

"It gives new meaning to multiple orgasm!"

No, seriously... not my quote, not this time!

Quote of the day

2007-05-25T16:10:00.000+02:00

The Johnny Depp roadmap to life: "Remember that you make your own reality. You don't have to stay in a little shell that was hammered out for you from childhood. We're all conditioned to live the way our parents want us to live, and that turns people into serial killers sometimes. At a certain point you have to come out and live your life the way you want to live it." movies.go.com/moviesproxy/jeannewolf?columnid=893635

Old things

2007-05-22T08:53:00.000+02:00

Johnny Depp is not only a great actor, the fans also know him for the fact he wears his clothes until they fall apart (sometimes even áfter they fall apart) ;)

His boots ("my old friends") are legendary. And it often happens that he wears something he also wore about 15 years ago. He is also very careful with his sunglasses!

Little quiz: in what movie does he wear these sunglasses? This pic is taken last weekend during the Pirates-premiere in Anaheim...

Pirates are coming!!!

2007-05-20T17:43:00.000+02:00

Yesterday the premiere of Pirates of the Caribbean - At World's End was in the USA. Johnny Depp, Orlando Bloom and Bill Night ("Davy Jones") were there, too. Later this week there will be a worldwide release (I'll watch it Wednesday!!!).

Last year ago we had Dead Man's Chest with a bit too much promotion before the release. That was great for the impatient fans, but at the same time, they gave away a bit too much, and many scenes weren't a surprise anymore... This time, Disney did it better.

Like: the acting part of Keith Richard is still secret! The only bit about Keith's part that "leaked" was a blurry picture of him as Captain Teague. The people who saw the (pre-)premiere said his part was small, but still great!

Every time Johnny Depp appears in public, people discuss how he looks. Last year, with the Dead Man's Chest premieres, he was dressed in a suit with a grey hat. This year he's back into the bohemian style he had several years ago (I love that!). And... his old pals were with him, too! Those pals are: his totally wornout shoes...! :)

Softies are stronger...

2007-05-15T00:46:00.000+02:00

Ik had nog nooit gehoord van oorlogsverslaggeefster Kate Webb, die afgelopen weekend op 64-jarige leeftijd overleed. Toen ik online de kranten doorkeek, las ik over haar. En één quote sprong me tegemoet: "Ik ben een echte softie. Misschien is dat ook wel wat je nodig hebt - moet je soft zijn om te overleven. Harde mensen breken."

I never heard about war reporter Kate Webb, who passed away this weekend at age 64. While reading the online newspapers, I read about her. And one quote caught my eye...: "I'm a real softie. But maybe that's what it takes... You have to be soft to survive. Hard people shatter."